Caterwauling

… oh, who the hell am I kidding? I’m *always* snarkalicious.

I was running errands this weekend when I ran into someone from my long-ago past. And damn it, he looked good. They do that to us, you know — they get better-looking with time. Whereas I’ve gained an extra ass cheek and crow’s feet since then. *sigh* Stunning.

I was the one who walked away from him, though. Well, ran away is more like it. For those of you who have been around this joint for years, are you nuts? you may remember him as the one to whom I’d said, “That’s IT?!?!” after, ah, activities.

I also changed my phone number so he would Quit. Calling. Me.

In any event, I found the old-school blog entry from the day we met. And I realized that while I get mad at myself these days for squelching my feelings down so deeply that they explode like a freaking Zambelli’s fireworks display (see: meltdown, today’s sobbing and swearing), well, apparently I used to give away a *twee* bit too much of the truth.

Here’s part of that entry. Good lord, who was that girl?

Anyway, when I saw G., he was with a new girlfriend, I guess. And Evil Dawn surfaced long enough to think, “Awww, so that’s who he’s disappointing in bed now!”

Bitchiness: Coping with all the bullshit in life, one snarky comment at a time.

It’s been quite a creative couple of days here at Chez Dawn.

First, I gots me a French pedicure:

Then Tiff got bitten by the crafty bug, and we ended up going to Clay Cafe Studios in honor of her birthday to get all crafty and stuff.

I made a tabletop:

It’s the big square in the center of all my other mosaic crap, BTW. It’s got a mirror in the center.

Clay Cafe gave me mauve-colored grout. Gah. Mauve! I went to Michaels and bought some bluish-silver grout, which I need to apply one of these days. I have a wrought-iron table to which I am going to superglue that mofo. I can’t wait.

More of me and my cobalt/black/mirrored glass fetish:

But wait, there’s more.

While I was at Michaels, I started collecting crap for a holiday swag. I grabbed greenery and started shoving all kinds of glittery blue and silver flowers in it, and people actually began stopping me, telling me how pretty it was and asking where I’d got it. Hah. With the creativity that runs in my family, they’d be appalled if I actually bought and didn’t make something.

Here’s the swag, in regular lighting:

I threw it together in five minutes, tops.

I tried to get a pic of it all lit up with the blue lights. Twenty-seven pix later, this is the best I could do (clearly, photography is not one of my creative pursuits). Well, it could be the 2 mpx camera, but oh well.

And it wouldn’t be a holiday without a bad cat eating my creation:

And, last but not least in the creative pursuits:

37,500 / 50,000 (75.0%)

Reader Poll Monday

1. What is your favorite Thanksgiving food?
Stuffing balls. Not that the holiday is going to be the slightest bit traditional this year, but that is what I look forward to all year round. We cook with real butter in my family (see: ass, explains size of), and there aint’ nothin’ tastier than fried stuffing balls. *drool* Too bad mom’s oven got stolen.

2. If you could impose a heavy luxury tax on any single item, what would it be?
Bibles. Perhaps then the religious right and other assorted wack-jobs would quit beating my freedoms and rights with them so carelessly.

3. What’s the most interesting job you’ve ever had?
I’m still waiting for it. I seem to tell the most stories about my days in PR/fundraising/marketing. Every day was a grab bag of “What the hell is today going to bring?” I loved it — kept the ideas fresh and constantly generating.

4. Have you ever been on TV?
I’ve been at events with TV cameras (see “David Letterman”), as well as a lot of fund-raising events that I’d helped to coordinate. But thankfully no, my ass moves quickly out of the camera’s way.

5. If you had a 5 year old daughter who wanted to be in a pageant, would you let her?
Momma needs to pay the rent, so she should learn to earn her keep as early as possible. Have at it, munchkin.

6. Would you rather have a constant itch, or a constant sore throat?
Itches can be soothed. Sore throats cannot. Although, where exactly is this itch and who gave it to me? Because I’d have to inflict revenge on them for eternity!

7. What’s one TV show you simply cannot miss each week?
Like y’all couldn’t answer this one for me.

Monday: “Medium”
Tuesday: “The Office,” “Law & Order”
Wednesday: Hmm, nothing. Wow.
Thursday: “Reunion,” “ER”
Friday: “The Soup”
Saturday: Enh. “SNL” if I’m around
Sunday: “Desperate Housewives,” “Grey’s Anatomy”

8. When is the last time you went out dancing?
Ah, I used to be a fixture at the gay bars. But alas, it’s been a coupla years. And honestly? No desire to go back. I’d rather go do the “white man’s overbite” at the straight bars.

9. Does hearing Christmas music before Thanksgiving annoy anyone else as much as it annoys me?
Hearing it in August kind of made me insane. Hearing it nonstop from now till doomsday is a twee bit obnoxious. But you want to see me go into convulsions? Play “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.” And prepare to have my most wonderful foot in your ass for the holidays.

10. Ask me something.
I know you love to bake, but what’s your favorite “real food” to prepare?

If not for Sunday nights (”Grey’s Anatomy,” *swoon*) and Thursdays (my other medical drama, “ER”), I probably wouldn’t cry. And hell, “Reunion” is just awesome, too.

“ER” has been having a good season, but tonight was just magnificent. Neela went on a ride-along with the medics, John Stamos in particular. They both gave such amazing performances tonight. But the end, ah. *melt* I’m giving my West Coast readers the benefit of the doubt (i.e., we can talk about it tomorrow), but HOLY SHIT, next episode’s previews. *sob* Seriously.

At some point, I’m going to get a life of my own. Until then, thank the TV gods and goddesses for November sweeps. …

Good things reportedly come to those who wait, but do they stop for those who are too busy to notice?

Or am I just doing things right this time around and the reward will come when it’s ready to and not necessarily when I’m ready for it?

Either way, give me the strength to play my part flawlessly in the interim. And beyond.

Unrelated, if you missed my characters taking on a life of their own, then you need to go catch that discussion. It’s magnificent.

But the question at this juncture of the book is, which one of you is the father? And will our heroine ever really know?

I hope you guys have enjoyed all the fun events I’ve orchestrated for you. You’ve gotten to know yourselves a little bit better, and you’re really starting to know your place in this world. You’ve gotten familiar with each other (in so many ways) and really feel like you’ve made the right decisions based on the information I’ve already given you.

The Author

27,500 / 50,000 (55.0%)