Simple things

More accurately, simpletons

Amy had a great post about the intellectual bankruptcy we’re seeing in our nation every day, and I realized that I myself am a little more than hot under the collar about these things, and not just because I have only today just broken my 101.5-degree fever that I’ve had for a week.

Now, per the usual, I’m not saying what or who ate my breakfast on my behalf, but I’m mad enough to make others suffer for it. 😉

A few weekends ago, I went to see “Prime”, although I’d say it was mistitled, at best. I liked about the first hour of the movie, but the second and third hour (!) were tragically unnecessary. And painful. I should’ve saved my money to go see “Derailed” and “Rent”.

But that said, I got to the theater early to get a good seat. Which is probably useless when you go to a theater like mine that’s always sold out. I have major claustrophobia issues and loathe being in proximity to people I don’t know. Not to mention, I’d been scribbling in my journal till the lights went down and I’d already moved my seat once to get away from someone who was reading over my shoulder. Jeez.

Anyway, I’ll tell you why I was really pissed off. I had empty seats on both sides of me. A gentleman was two seats over to my left and a woman was to my right. The guy and I were kind of talking — he seemed sweet. But then, two ghetto broads came over and wanted two seats together. As in, I had to move.

Which, let me tell you, you shouldn’t get in there late because no one has to give you two seats together. Furthermore, I’d just seen those assholes across the street at Starbucks, screaming into their cell phones as I tried to write in my journal in anything but peace. I remember thinking, “Oh god, don’t let them be waiting for the same movie as I am.”

God had other plans — to drive up my blood pressure even higher than usual, to start.

So, not really thinking about it (because, fundamentally, I am not an asshole), I moved my seat. Had I been thinking, I would’ve gone next to the guy (heh) but I sat next to the chick.

But wait, there’s more.

So the ghetto twins proceeded to talk. And talk. And talk some more. Straight through the previews, right into the first 15 minutes of the movie. And shoveling popcorn into their mouths like they’d been starved for a week. All the crunching and mumbling was driving me mad.

But then, the bitches shut up. For awhile. Until …


Yes, the fuckhead sitting next to me, who’d slobbered and giggled through the “turn off your phone” segments, had left hers on. She let it ring a couple of times till she could figure out who was calling. I wanted to stomp on her foot.

Worse? She ANSWERED IT!!! At this point, I decided I was entitled to listen in. She gave no indication that she was at a movie, and it was only a matter of minutes before I let the guy on the other end talk to her ASS, because that’s where I was planning to insert the phone — preferably with my pointy-toed shoe.

She ended the convo quickly enough, but then she had to DISCUSS IT WITH HER FRIEND.

*collapses into hysterical sobs*

Why god WHY can’t I get a moment’s peace from obliviots?!?!?

One Lonely Response to Simple things

  1. Erica :

    Ooh, thanks for reminding me that Rent is coming out.