Caterwauling

Been dancing with the dead at night again.

My dream last night started out good. I saw Grampy, dressed up as a cleaning lady. Which he’d done when I was young and it was hilarious. I saw Mom and Gram and I want to say Janna in the same outfits.

It was adorable but there was some entity out there they went to speak to, on my behalf.

One by one, they returned with tears in their eyes. It was a no, whatever it was.

I remember saying fuck it, I’m going to go speak to this entity myself. This MF isn’t going to deny the living.

Out of nowhere, Cocoa was released from the doorway (it was now apparent) where my beloveds were coming to speak with me.

Oh that pretty, pretty little girl. The way she looked at me with those big green eyes.

She rubbed my ankles and walked out the door while I talked with Grampy.

I was going to go after her but she never really got too far from me in the past. I figured I’d keep talking to Grampy as long as the mysterious figure would let me, then I’d go get my baby.

Well.

I heard metal slam outside. I said goodbye to Grampy and ran out.

Cocoa had gone into a store that was closing and the steel gates had slammed down. On a timer, too, so there was no human who could help me.

I freaked the fuck out. I screamed that she has thyroid problems. I can’t wait eight hours till you reopen!

I’m calling Joe Biden! I screamed.

That woke me up.

God if only Joe Biden could still save us from the evil overlords who stole the election and destroyed our country in eight easy steps.

If only Joe could reunite me with Cocoa and Grampy and my family beyond the veil.

I feel like I am going to want to remember this dream, so here it is.

In better times, I had decided to do a fast trip to D.C. for a concert.

This was before I did Disneyland, West Hollywood and Vegas. And before that dipshit took a wrecking ball to the East Wing and to the FAA.

And before Marriott pulled the plug on Sonder and canceled all our reservations this week.

So basically I paid good money for the last seat at a Sarah McLachlan show.

But I had a cheapie hotel room and a flight credit from switching from Santa Ana Airport to LAX. So, net-net, I was fine.

Well.

It was in fact too good to be true to be able to stay in G-town for $200.

Friends had offered their house, long before I even booked that hotel.

But I also knew MTV moron Sean Duffy was thinking about cutting flights and blaming it on Democrats.

So if for some reason I’d get stuck, I didn’t want it to be my friends’ problem.

Though that seems to be ideal actually. A nice place to stay while I wait, if I need to wait.

In any event, I tried every day for the past week to sell my tickets.

But the event organizer said haha fuck you.

I even asked Ticketmaster if there’s a way around it, as I’m feeling defeated.

They were super nice and said if the organizer is going to turn on resale, it will be Friday night.

If. Great.

I’ve sold tickets back to TM. At breakeven or a loss. I’m not fleecing people like I got fleeced for the Miami Eras Tour. Which … fuck yeah I’d have paid twice that.

Like I told the TM agent, I know there are other hotels and even flights if mine get changed.

Shit, I even know this is the least cruel thing that flatulent fascist has done in his life.

But I’m just not excited anymore to see an artist I haven’t seen live since 1998.

So right now I’m doing all the pros and cons to going.

Pros — cat sitter has already been paid, flight paid, ticket paid, city I love, friends I love, chance of seeing a holiday market, proximity to Levain and Georgetown Cupcake and that place with the killer cinnamon macarons.

Cons — No hotel. Flight delay risks. So motherfucking behind at work and I cannot stand hearing from that treadmill lady every MF day of my MF life. Meetings I’ll have to take from the airport. Not being there for Crooked Con (it’s over) or the holiday market I REALLY loved (starts next week). Also, I really just wanna go to Disney for a day. Finally, every time I travel, some fucked-up dipshit tries to contact me and ruin my trips. I won’t let him ruin any more of my time. But I know his bitch ass is lurking.

Well that settled nothing.

I mean, there are worse things than going on another vacation where someone is bugging me about doing work that doesn’t benefit the customer or the company.

I don’t know. I gave myself till today to decide, and I got nothin.