Caterwauling

… before we get even more snow. As if the torture of driving on Thursday wasn’t wretched enough, apparently tomorrow’s morning rush is going to be a sleety, snowy fiesta and the shit’s gonna continue all day. Hurrah.

I took advantage of the nice day and ran errands in the morning and fucked around at the outlet shops at Potomac Mills. Yay Old Navy outlet! I swear, I had vowed to never again set foot in that store, and in retrospect, I shouldn’t have, because I am the proud owner of a bunch more miniskirts for which I have absolutely no use. I swear, the last thing I need is more casual/slut wear — it is in my best interests to buy workwear, and bland stuff at that. One thing I have learned throughout my years in the office is that monochrome is the way to go — and, if you really want your life to be easy, the longer the skirt and the higher the neckline are also very much in order.

I used to try very hard to have an individual sense of style. But lately, mix & match has been my salvation. Because the option of mixing colors and textures with jeans isn’t an option anymore. Although I do arrive in jeans and sneakers. Which means I go through twice the number of outfits in a week, but I can’t sit in a freezing-cold car (often after scraping ice from the windshield) in pantyhose and heels. And for some reason, my damn windows are always steamed up (is it because I am so hot? *wink*), so I can’t even use the freaking heat in the mornings and I need to blast the damn a/c for an hour … if that don’t chill your hoo-ha, I don’t know what will! And we wonder why I guzzle coffee by the gallon before, during and after my ride!

I have to admit that I spent the day in Prince William because I had laundry to do and we all know how much I abhor that. And while I was there, guess who I ran into but the ignorant bitch! HAH! I saw her giving me the hairy eyeball and wondered what I had done to piss her off, and then I remembered who she was. Hee hee. I didn’t bother using a dryer today — I took my wet clothes straight home and hung them in the bathroom. She literally sat and glared bullets at me the whole time my clothes were in the washer (I was reading a magazine and trying not to notice). I wasn’t going to let her steal my thunder, because I’d had a great fucking day buying discounted hoochie-mama clothes and am looking forward to warmer weather so I can wear them, even if I can only wear them during the weekends.

Ah, spring. It’s coming. This winter of our discontent is almost behind us.

And because I can never let a post go by without sharing a neurosis, I admit that I’ve been waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop. Things have been looking up really well during the last few weeks. I knew something was coming to make me nuts. And it came. And went. And I barely even noticed. I guess when you’ve been through hell, your nerve endings get kind of desensitized when something happens that normally would have devastated you at one time in your life.

Don’t get me wrong — I had a brief moment of self-pity and a few moments of “if only” type of reflection — if only I were this or that or NOT this or that, etc. And then I went back to my memorized “Desiderata,” and I remembered that yes, in fact, I have a right to be here. And my flaws are temporary, as is the person that I am right at this very minute. I am growing and changing and evolving and becoming the best version of my myself at every opportunity. Which means that this, too, shall pass. And I can’t wait to see what’s standing in line waiting for me after this goes away, which — like this crazy winter — it will be a faded memory sooner than I think.

Or, maybe my mom said it best. “You just need somebody to get you drunk and give you a good fuck. Life always looks better after one of those.”

God, I love my mom. 😉

On iTunes: The Calling, “Our Lives”

This entry was posted on Sunday, February 27th, 2005 at 6:57 PM and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.