Rolling. …

Oh my motherfucking god. My favorite female artist, Melissa Etheridge, has done a cover of Joan Armatrading’s “The Weakness in Me.” Click your mouse on the link to download it. Immediately. Or sooner! I SO have to get that concert DVD that’s available on Nov. 5.

The reason I even visited the site was to get my song lyric fix of the day:

“You’ve never been to the moon

But don’t you want to go

Under the sea in the volcano

You’ve never looked into my eyes

But don’t you want to know

What the dark and the wild

And the different know

Come dance with me now

We’ll dance without a care

I’m as free as a fire

And change is in the air

There are some things in my life

I’ll never understand

But they become the force

That makes me who I am

Don’t you worry about the kids

The kids are all right

Mama’s rollin’ in the back yard

Filled with love and light

‘Cause you live and you learn

And you learn to hold on

And time will make it heal

And time will make it gone

Come with me now

Come with me now

It’s time to try

It’s time to fly”

— Melissa Etheridge, “The Different” —

Speaking of rolling. …

My ethereal feeling before I went out last night has lasted through this moment, and thankfully, all was good. Better than good.

Spent most of the evening with a 20-year-old cutie named Matt who’s straight (I believe him when he says it — I can certainly forgive moments of kissing someone of the same sex, though, because I’d be a real hypocrite if I set a different standard for him … hello, pot — meet kettle!). At any rate, we hung out all night and curled up for three hours of non-sleep (more like enjoying the trance, not doing naughty things). hee hee. He went to Elizabeth Forward High School (very close to McKeesport High School, where I wasted four years of my life), and his dad lives in Penn Hills, where IKEA Boy’s strange-and-estranged family lives. Seems kind of neat and weird that we’d all collide in Virginia, of all places. 🙂

I can’t remember the last time I slept in someone’s arms. Perhaps when I was dating Jeff, back in February, but then again, he always had one hand gripping his weiner like a vise, just in case I went all Lorena Bobbit on him, or something. lol. He was proud of that thing … and I certainly had no complaints!!!

Anyway, it was nice to just have a nice, cozy night with a man, no strings attached. He’s a new friend of IKEA Boy’s, so if he wants to continue the saga, he knows how to reach me. And at this point, I think I’d be up for getting to know him better. Brilliant kid … seemed really insightful about a lot of things and was also more than willing to admit how much more he wants to learn about the world. (I must insert the disclaimer that he talked a lot, while I kinda spaced out for the most part because I was feeling entirely too good and wanted to enjoy the artificial high while it lasted.)

He was sweet … told me that from the first second we met, he was attracted to me and was worried that I would think he was just a kid, being that he’s eight years my junior. I assured him that I’ve dated 35-year-olds (Jeff, cough cough) who are far less mature. He seemed happy with that.

Speaking of childish men over 30, ran into Krakhead David last night while we were in the front room, waiting for the main room to open up. He was with a girl, and all I have to say is that I am way cuter than she is, but really, she’s more on his level than I was. (boy, that came out mean!) I spotted them making out at the bar, and quickly looked away. When I glanced back, I saw him watching me. So, I turned my back and found that about five minutes later, they had disappeared.

Saw him again, while we were upstairs hanging out in the chairs (I think I can safely refer to that hallway as the “Halls of Medicine” — lol). I was chatting with this cute, straight-acting guy named Troy, and I felt someone staring at me. I barely glanced up and back at Troy, but I saw enough … Krakhead watched me while he walked the entire distance of the hallway. And he walked very slowly. He was alone, and once he passed me, I saw him turn around and look at me over his shoulder.

I refused to even make eye contact, and I can be pretty convinced that both times I saw him, he couldn’t tell that I even knew who he was. But I knew. Cripes, we kissed for like four hours on the night we met, and we did have that one supposedly good date. Oh well. His loss, completely. I was glad that I didn’t acknowledge him. Of course, IKEA Boy said I should’ve run up to him, in front of his chick, and told him I was pregnant. LOL … what would’ve been even funnier is that there was no CHANCE of that ever happening!!!

At any rate, thanx to IKEA Boy for another fabulous night out! Thank you, thank you — for adding a straight boy to your circle of friends!!! Even if he DOES live three hours away. 🙂 Just something to look forward to, I guess. It’s more fun this way, with no expectations.

IKEA Boy has been piling the compliments on me lately … one in particular I remember was when he pointed out a guy checking me out and nearly breaking his neck to look back at me. He told me that I’m way more attractive than I will ever give myself credit for. That was nice to hear, even if some days, I just don’t feel it. At any rate, I met tons of people last night, both straight and gay, and I had the time of my life. If only we could always feel that good … if only we didn’t have to keep reminding ourselves that so much of what happens in the simulated fog of the dance floors is merely an illusion. But those are the times that keep us going, to know that happiness does exist and that we know what it feels like, when and if it ever happens again.

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