OK, so I’ve been hot for my downstairs neighbor for about 10 minutes. I saw his girlfriend and realized that I am way cuter, so it wouldn’t be too hard to get a lil upstairs/downstairs action going, right?

Until I actually looked at his car. Nothing wrong with it per se, but the rosary hanging from the rearview mirror didn’t exactly make me wet my pants. But now that I am in the house, overlooking the parking lot, I see the “Bush/Cheney” sticker on the bumper. Oh HELL no! I’m gonna go write another ode to my vibrator — looks like we’ll be spending even more quality time together. …

On iTunes: ‘Til Tuesday, “I Could Get Used to This”

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