Mornings

You know it’ll be a good day when you remembered to take the shower toys out of the shower before you sprayed Tilex. 😉

Yesterday morning wasn’t so fortunate. Don’t worry — no toys were harmed during the recording of this message — but I awakened with a mouthful of vomit. Why? Because apparently the cats thought it would be cute to SHIT in EVERY ROOM.

I fed them “Good” food the night before — usually they get the cheap, dry Cat Chow crap. Which they will be getting from now until the end of time, thanks to the Sunday Night Shitfest. I mean, it was bloody shit, too — like they popped a blood vessel, trying to push out all that wet, stinky goodness.

Seriously, next time I open up the balcony and let the cats play outside, I am shutting the door behind them.

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE
The bitches? SHIT IN MY WHITE SHIRT that I was planning to wear today. ARGH! I found some vomit in a couple of my socks, too. There went a laundry basket full of clean whites. Kill. …

On iTunes: Rick Springfield, “Jessie’s Girl”

2 Responses to Mornings

  1. Two cats guy :

    WHY do your cats poop everywhere so much? mine always use their box. What’s up with that?

  2. Dawn :

    Dude, it ain’t nice to torment me like that. Maddie might have to come over and poop and wipe her ass on your wall, just so you don’t feel left out. 🙂