Well, poop

Thursday is only wearing 15 pieces of flair.

Well said, Tom. Well said.

We’re dealing with Mousegate in Cubicle Hell today. How those fat, furry little fuckers managed to squeeze their big mouse butts into everyone’s file cabinets is beyond me. They even got into our drawers and ate the foam off of our noise-canceling headphones.

Seems the rodents have a penchant for granola bars, almonds and instant oatmeal. But while they ate my maple-sugar-flavored oatmeal (good on them — I hate it anyway) and skipped my plain oatmeal, they skipped the maple at my friend’s desk and went for the apple-cinnamon.

I’m going to have to bring in latex gloves tomorrow to clean up all the mouse crap. Dude, they ruined two of my three pairs of headphones!

The little bastards peed in some folks’ file cabinets, but I think my little invaders must have found a laxative in someone’s workstation, because I’ve had birds do less damage to my windshield. Didn’t they get the memo that you’re not supposed to shit where you eat?

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