Monday: You’re fired!

And I’m not opposed to kneecapping the remainder of the week, either.

Today started off with realizing that I didn’t have enough boobs to fill up my shirt, so I had to wear a shirt under it or else risk getting sent home by the corporate fashion police. And it was all downhill from there.

I’m going to say it once and for all: I hate Mondays. They can and will get easier, but I’ve been spending the past two years pounding on something week after week — just rolling the rock to the top of the mountain and trying not to get my feet flattened on the way up. Mondays rob me of what little joy I got out of the weekend and they take five days’ worth of energy. Meaning, I work hard enough to earn the rest of the week off.

But alas, the fun is just getting started.

I was full of joy today and I was hellbent on retaining it. Or the bulk of it. OK, just some of it. I’m always happy to be around my closest colleagues. It’s just those others that you have to be careful of.

(*nine paragraphs deleted*)

Instead of what I was going to write, I am going over some text message and instant message convos today that were funny. I think I’m going to just share the text that made me crack up today, although I have some stupendously entertaining friends all around. …

Friend: Holy snowballs, Batman! We got 7 inches yesterday
Friend: Snow, that is 😉
Friend: I feel like I never left D.C.
Me: I would kill for 7 inches
Me: And some balls
Me: But not frozen white ones 😉
Friend: There you go, reading my mind again.

Five days till my three-day vacation, 25 days till the movie marathon and 30 days till the Bon Jovi concert.

Hopefully that’s only the start of the joy this screwy year is going to bring and not the main course, because I may just have to fire the remainder of 2008 while I’m at it. …

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