I’ve certainly had worse days

Well, my heart is starting to feel less like it’s been pummeled against a cheese grater.

And the belt I chose to wear today — at the same hole I used to use to keep the thing secured at my waist — is now a hip belt.

Oh, and the shirt that would just never button over the ol’ muffin top? Stays buttoned even when I sit.

I used to assume that any boy troubles I had were inversely related to the size of my pudgy pork roast ass. Now I realize, as it’s a leaner pork roast these days, that size really only matters when it comes to THEIR pants. And also, they’re mostly just clueless anyway.

In any event, I can has progress? Can has!

One Lonely Response to I’ve certainly had worse days

  1. Pisco Sours :

    Congratulations and mazel tov! You do start feeling better once you see some progress.

    (Oh, and just on the off chance you should get depressed and see the pill pusher? Demand Wellbutrin. Five pounds are gone this week like THAT. Mais malheureusement, je n’ai plus de cul.)