It’s like New Year’s resolutions for your personnel file

It’s performance review day for me. I have been struggling to find time come up with my top 3 accomplishments for the past year, but according to my team, here they are:

1. I didn’t kill anyone.
2. I didn’t sexually harass anyone.
3. I didn’t show up drunk.

With the caveat at the end of each sentence being, of course, “… that anyone knows of.” 😉

What are my goals for the coming year? To meet last year’s goals, of course! To stop eating out of the vending machine and go out and get some real food once in a while. To rip down all my decorations and embrace the Spartan lifestyle. To meet deadlines more than just occasionally. To go out and smoke more. To not kill or sexually harass anyone and to definitely not show up drunk. (Hungover does not qualify as drunk, for the record.) To take naps whenever possible to keep up my momentum for longer stretches of time.

Here’s to another year of being gainfully employed!

One Lonely Response to It’s like New Year’s resolutions for your personnel file

  1. Kara :

    Congratulations on making it through another year and another Review. For the record I hated those reviews where you state what you accomplished and what you hope to accomplish for next year. Who are they kidding. they know what they want you to do…and what you should be doing….