Infinite blondeness

So Mom just called to give me the scoop on my grandfather (the usual abysmal stuff) but of course made an ass out of herself, which I always enjoy.

My grandfather has never gone a day in his life without shaving, but with the onset of hospital-induced ineptitude, he hasn’t shaved in almost two weeks. So she did it. And she had no idea what she was doing, leaving a goatee because she didn’t know how to shave his chin.

So the social worker mentions to her on the phone that my grandfather looks like someone shaved him — was it her?

And Mom, in her infinite blondness, said, “Yeah — I’ve never shaved a man before and I missed some.

“I know you’re supposed to go down on them. …”

She hears him whimper quietly. But she missed the cue.

” … and come up around the chin and I got tired and I wasn’t really sure what I was doing. …”

At which point he stopped her because he couldn’t take it any more.

“Go down on them.” Heh. That’s my mom!

3 Responses to Infinite blondeness

  1. Old Freind :

    I Love that WOBBIN!!!!!!!!!

  2. Barb :

    I’m sorry to hear about your grandfather and the way he’s been treated. I hope things improve all around soon.

  3. Evil Genius :

    OMG, that was classic!! But I do hope your grandad is faring better now.