Big-girl furniture!

“Little girls don’t know how to be sweet girls.
Mama didn’t teach me.
Little boys don’t know how to treat little girls.
Daddy didn’t show me.

Face down, on top of your bed.
Oh why did I give it up to you?
Is this how I shoot myself up high,
Just high enough to get through?

Again, the false affection.
Again, we break down inside.
Love save the empty.
Love save the empty, and save me.”

— Erin McCarley, “Love Save the Empty”

Newest earworm. Enjoy!

So, I did a grown-up thing and bought a dining room set yesterday. Plus a matching baker’s rack, which is something I’ve always wanted.

Of course, that means emptying and breaking down the nine thousand boxes in the dining room without moving them to the living room, where there’s also a mighty pile of those. (Thanks to an ant problem, we have stacked boxes and put Kadie’s food dishes on top of them.)

(Another random parenthetical — I addressed my rent check to the “Ant Capital of the World.” Think that will get my message across?)

I’ve not wanted to invest any money into my apartments, but it’s time. I just thought if I could get rid of the UEOEH, I could feel free to decorate again. I mean, she never has any money or food, so anytime I spend money on myself, I feel guilty that she’s sitting around moping, lonely and hungry.

Yes, the view IS wonderful from the cross — funny you should ask!

I haven’t had a dining set since, well, I think 2003 when I moved from my first apartment in Alexandria, Va., to the second. I got rid of the chairs (Maddie had destroyed them) and kept the table. The table served many appetizers over the course of many parties quite well. But when I left Virginia in 2006, the table and the couch stayed behind.

It took me until about 2008 to replace the couch, and now 2010 for the dining set. It’s not that I have been searching for the perfect pieces but, rather, spending that much money in one transaction sends me diving toward paper bags to regulate my breathing.

Besides, I’d rather book one of those $150 Palm-Beach-to-Atlantis weekend cruises and spend four times that on booze for two days. (That’d be for three glasses of wine. Total.) I’m more about investing in experiences, in technology, in trips to Marshall’s for purses and dresses.

There are four chairs with this set. One for me, for Kadie, for Laura and for George. Like one of my beloveds said yesterday, “Oh, wow, a dining room for all the meals you WON’T be having with the UEOEH!”

I just figured it would be an impetus to get all the boxes out of the dining room. Which, worked sort of magically and I threw away 12 boxes yesterday. Score! Eight thousand more to go! (99% are NOT mine.)

It wasn’t that expensive, but I do go nuts when I make any kind of purchase. It’s a carry-over from my not-employed days (six years ago!). Oy. I remember investing in my apartment back then and, of course, all the tags had been ripped off of all the new stuff when the income ran out. That was great fun.

But I always try to buy something significant to mark milestones in my life. This was a purchase I’ve needed to make for a while, yes. But I also made a major decision for the business that circumvented emotion and friendship and was truly in the best interest of the company. It was a grown-up moment. So I deserve a grown-up dining room. Damn it!

And of course, after this minor expenditure, the car rewarded me by stalling out at the drive-thru today. I went to Mickey D’s for a diet Coke and the car started drifting in reverse. It had never done that before! I didn’t know what to do. Of course, I figured it out REAL quick. But it was no rush — it took 33 minutes to get to the pickup window from the order screen. Apparently they were frying up one McNugget at a time or something!

I’ve had my phone off all weekend. Every time I turn it on to send a text, I am amazed at how many calls I’ve missed. Popular, I never dreamed I was. I’m not answering. Not in the mood. Not even listening to the pile of messages. Frankly, save for an hour on the computer today at work, I am out of commission till tomorrow morning.

I’m also laying low on Facebook. Seriously, I need a break. Not from the world, nor from everyone. Just a few people. It’s like my mom — I got a text from her the other day telling me “I miss us!” and I refrained from saying, “I miss you living four hours away!” I just have to bite my tongue and wait it out till I can choke out a few minutes of getting along.

“Sad boy, you stare up at the sky
When no one’s looking back at you.
You wear your every last disguise;
You’re flying, then you fall through.

Again, the false attention.
Again, you’re breaking inside.
Love save the empty.
Love save the empty, save me.”

I’m getting ready for church now. Apparently Foursquare coronated me the mayor of it. Say hello to the holiest woman in South Florida — the Mother Theresa of the Palm Beaches. I half-wonder whether the only reason I’m going is to retain my title. 😉 There’s no message tonight — just music. And that sounds pretty much like the perfect end to a stressful week and weekend to me!

Comments closed.