Barrels o’ boredom

Nothing’s news around these parts. The whole hallway at work is still populated (circa 9 p.m.). Good thing is, I was so engrossed in my day that I didn’t realize it was so late. I also got mah monies for the next year, as it’s raise time. Whee!

Hell, I’m just glad to have a job in this economy. But they were kind to me anyway, so whee. Now if I could just get the cats to get a job, life would be pretty damn good.

What else? Lots of alcohol this weekend. Went drinking out of state with the lovely Sabre et al. A creepy dude was trying to pick up our friend, and he asked my name. I said it (think “Sunshine”) and he’s like, “John?”

Do you know how many times people do that to me? Do you know any girls named John?!?!

So I repeated my name. And he goes, “Ah! Like the dishwashing detergent!”

He was all sorts of special. I’ll stop talking about that now — can’t breathe past the vomit in my mouth from the memory.

But speaking of things, well, I shouldn’t speak of (but isn’t that why y’all come here?), I was driving home that night when I almost made an illegal left turn (there was a sign pointing to the road I needed — the problem was, the actual exit was another 35 yards away). So, genius goes to make the turn when she sees that:

A) It’s a one-way
B) There’s a cop sitting right there, waiting to pull my inebriated ass over


So, I corrected myself in a big hurry and got on the right track. And hell if that cop didn’t follow me for five solid miles.

I wasn’t worried — believe me, I can drink. But I was really tired, hence why my judgment was off about where my actual exit was. Thank the lord above, the cop decided I was fine and toddled off to irritate some other out-of-towner.

I ended up sleeping through church yesterday, even though they very kindly e-mailed us to remind us to set our clocks ahead so that we wouldn’t miss Sunday services. Fuck, I usually roll into church with the prior night’s bar wristband(s) — this time, I kept my drunk ass in bed and missed out altogether.

I was dumb and didn’t drink my requisite gallon of water, nor did I have any headache medicine on the premises. I did get a glass of water and put it on the nightstand, although I was rudely awakened two hours into my slumber because Maddie was trying to drink out of the glass and ended up knocking it over because her pudgy widdle head got stuck in it. Scared the crap outta me. Brat.

What else? Oh, I dyed the drapes to match the carpet. Exciting stuff, I tell ya. Don’t you wish you were me?

Am down to no money whatsoever till payday. I could return two pairs of shoes I have in my closet, but really — who gives up shoes for food? But alas, my bonus is arriving on payday, so if the blog goes dark for a month, assume I’ve taken a vacation and left the laptop behind. …

2 Responses to Barrels o’ boredom

  1. Sabre :

    That dude was creeptacular.

    Moving on…

    Yes, vakay is called for. I have spoken!

  2. miniskirtman :

    What else? Oh, I dyed the drapes to match the carpet. Exciting stuff, I tell ya. Don’t you wish you were me?

    Actually, that’s pretty sexy.