‘A million micro-decisions’
I put on “The Eras Tour” from Vancouver in the background to do some work.
And of course I’ve been mesmerized.
Almost forgot it was August. Feels like 100 years ago that I was sneaking off to the mall to meet someone.
If you’d look at us now, you’d never know we even knew each other in a way that wasn’t collegial.
“I act like I don’t remember.
Mary acts like she don’t care.”
Anyway the first of the six-episode docuseries just started.
Taylor’s finale-night speech to her dancers and bandmates always hit hard.
But today it hit different.
Sure, all the song lyrics she wove into the speech was adorable.
But the part got me today that “a million micro-decisions got us here.”
Like, this wasn’t “pieces falling into place” a la “All Too Well.”
She called them the pieces — the “tectonic plates,” to be specific.
I forget sometimes at work that I am a tectonic plate.
That I have earned the institutional memory the hard way.
I often tell MY boss stories of the past. The things Martin probably hasn’t told him.
If I’m lucky, I get Martin stories through him, as Martin and I don’t talk much anymore.
Anyway the micro-decisions hit different today. Because that’s what got me here. That’s what gets me through every week. A million micro-decisions.
So I might not have edited shitty newsletters that should have never existed because I was told there would be “no need for editorial support” which is a bigger lie than trump promising to bring down prices.
All my stress comes from these “no editorial support” needed products.
Who’s writing them or at least sourcing the data or going through a thousand freelancers?
Like if you told me to toss out the most stressful part of my job, it’s the whole having to make my case that I deserve a managing editor when I can’t catch up enough to even hire one.
But I know it’s a productivity issue. Which is a self-protection issue.
How do you manage 22 paid products, two daily free ones, and then double the free daily content on the same number of staff? And yes I know I supervise 22 people. But only three of us read/vet/edit this stuff and make it compliant and accurate and actionable.
Anyway I need to get all the shit out of my system so I can go write this stuff.
Which … one of my 22 said to me yesterday, “Hey, you’re pretty good at this writing stuff. You should do it for a living!”
Same person (independent of Kelly) also said maybe this place was your bridge during your worst season.
Maybe there’s something else out there for me that’s more resourced.
Where I can make the million micro-decisions without being the one to EXECUTE on them.
I find it really interesting that the universe is singing this same chorus to me repeatedly and in unexpected corners.
All my tarot reader really said was it’s time for your own byline. You’ve put in your dues. You don’t need to pay anymore. You’ve paid enough.
And this is how my closest friends interpret it.
Tectonic plate, Taylor says.
Time to cause a geological event, indeed.