Light-brown, dark-blonde, sorta-redheaded stepchild

I usually blog after church but, meh, I went shopping instead yesterday. Because, well, I took issue with some points, and one of those points was geared toward those of us who tend to take issue with some of God’s creatures. 🙂

I mean, one of the lessons was to realize that each person on this earth was created in God’s image, and that we all share the same father, so to speak. That is, we all have possess the same divine DNA and we should stop insulting/talking about/being sarcastic about/disrespecting each other because God doesn’t like it when his children are the butt of the joke.

So, I’m trying my hardest to not look at people who stand in our way, thwart our every effort or fail to pull their part of the load. But I still have a hard time believing they were cut from the same mold I was and that God can look at them with nothing but love. Don’t tell anyone, but I think a lot of these yahoos were either adopted or were the milkman’s kids, because they have GOT to be the exception from “don’t mess with the Lord’s anointed” because they sure as HELL don’t treat people the way they would want to be treated in return.

Anyway, today I’m sort of struggling with credit, or lack thereof. I pretty much have spent my career behind the scenes and I wonder whether it’s getting too late to make a real, bona fide name for myself in anything. I have the skills and talents and smarts to make it in one of the four fields I’ve pursued. But would anyone know me? Many of you might know my work. But my name is as far from it as Perez Hilton is from a ladies’ locker room.

Lately, I’m struggling with my motivation. Paychecks are a nice motivator, of course. 😉 I don’t know. I guess I thought I’d be famous by now. I also thought I’d be a size two, so I admittedly am a dreamer!

Speaking of places where everybody apparently DOES know your name, whether you want to be anonymous or not, I decided to become a “real” member of my church. I figure, I go all the time and make anonymous donations. I guess it’s about time I made this journey an official one. I have no idea what membership entails, but I asked for more info on it. Besides, I need all the help I can get on this plane of existence!

One other thing I took issue with was that they said that everything we have in our lives is on loan from God. I believe in it, don’t get me wrong. You can’t take it with you, and all that jazz. But I guess I wondered why some people have so much more than others. I’m not throwing a self-pity party here — I’m asking why families are living in/scavenging through garbage dumps for the source of their daily bread and yet other people release an obnoxious earworm or star in a movie that happens not to suck, and they take their rewards and snort ’em off a mirror.

I guess the lack of balance in this world has always irked me, and made me question whether there was a God or not. These days, I’m fairly certain there’s someone or something out there, because it would devastate me if there weren’t. But I just spend a lot more time wondering why when I should instead be helping to do something about it.

One Lonely Response to Light-brown, dark-blonde, sorta-redheaded stepchild

  1. Pisco Sours :

    Regarding your last paragraph: baby steps, my dear, baby steps. When I was first baptized, I was filled with zeal to change the world. You can’t do it all, but you can do something, anything, to make the world suck just a little less. For me, it’s through my job and volunteering at my church’s food pantry.

    You may have a different calling, but based on what you’ve written, I think you definitely are being called to something. It’s just a matter of figuring out what.