Just another night in Goddess Land

Be my valentine

Originally uploaded by dcwriterdawn

Oh, what a night.

So, mah Stillers didn’t win the Super Bowl. It was a great game and really close. But the Fudge Packers won and I’m sure Ben Roethlisberger’s karma had something to do with it. Of course, he is but one cog in a mighty team, so let’s just say it was Green Bay’s turn to win the championship.

Yeah, whatever. Damn it! Damn it all to hell!

Last time the Steelers played (and won!) in the Super Bowl, I think I made out with half the single men in Washington, D.C. I even ended up becoming friends with one of them. Ah, those were the days.

Anyway, JUST as I was lamenting my lack of male attention tonight, voila! One appeared.

See, smoking is not only hazardous to your physical health. When you step outside for a smoke, men can and will prey upon you and threaten your mental health, too. Yay, me.

He seemed fairly normal. Perhaps a little old for me, but you know what they say about beggars and choosers. He works in my field and it was nice to have a reasonably intelligent conversation about shit I know while our favorite team fought to make its comeback in the fourth quarter.

I left to go back to my friend — incidentally, a gal and I who haven’t seen each other since high school connected, which was a lot of fun — and I tried to slip out another exit because he was waiting for me. Aha, he’s a smart one. I had tried to go the long way around to my car, but DAMN IT, I walked right past his. I swear, he had to have radar on me because I thought I was being all sly and shit.

I’d had a nice buzz, but of course I had to sober my ass up right-quick so I could keep myself out of trouble and/or danger.

It was … weird. He had used the word, and when I left, I said thanks for a very weird conversation. He took offense to it, and I pointed out, “Your word, not mine.” (Thank you, instant sobriety.)

I’ll skip the details, but suffice it to say that it’s usually always this way. Someone seems normal enough, and then the red flag shoots up and all I want to do is run for the hills.

The problem was, I had given him my number when he seemed reasonably sane and nearly interesting. That time period was, unfortunately, finite. DAMN IT, DAMN IT, DAMN IT!!!!!

I had met someone in Key West last time I was there. More like he beelined to my side and NEVER LEFT. And since Mom was intent on cock-blocking, I had to miraculously vanish from there too. But he wasn’t such a wily one. That was an easy escape. Thank God. 🙂

This one tonight kept paying me compliments. I thanked him for nearly all of them, but I rolled my eyes at the last half-dozen. He asked if I were just one of those women who thinks they’re not worth anything.

I said hardly — I pointed out that I am quite secure in myself and really don’t need external validation. I know that I rule. 😉

Mentally, though, I was calculating how I should react to a man with, oh, a job. Like when I was in Key West, right after my ass had just been introduced to the door, I figured here was a guy with a job and a condo in New York. What could POSSIBLY go wrong?

Alas, I have to put myself back into my pre-job-loss shoes. Would I date him if I were at 100%-confidence levels? Probably not. Would I sleep with him? Nope. Not a spark in sight. Not even close.

I meant what I said, that I am the opposite of insecure. I fall into conversation easily. I know I am a catch. Maybe I don’t feel like much of one right now, what with my life so out-of-sorts. But this, too, shall pass. And I’ve settled for far too much in my life — I ain’t settling when it comes to a man. That’s for damn sure.

Perhaps he’s not as weird and creepy as he ultimately came across. I doubt it, though. My instincts are usually right the second time around.

In any case, whee there’s another number I get to ignore!

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