And so the dreams come true.
At least, it seems that things are headed that way.
Brat and I hooked up last night, and I find myself hoping that it was the first time of many that we share a symbiotic breath.
The song that keeps running through my mind:
“Running down a central reservation
In last night’s red dress
I can still smell you on my fingers
And taste you on my breath.”
— Beth Orton, “Central Reservation” —
It was quite unexpected, actually, but not unwelcome. It felt so real. I can’t get him out of my head … the taste of his kisses, the softness of his skin, his gentle giggles and murmurs. I can’t let this become a one-nighter — I didn’t want him to leave my bed, ever. It’s incredible to be with someone for whom I have a deep well of feelings. Are my days of empty, cheap sex finally over, or are they still simply in progress?
How it all began was with an invitation from Brat to attend a Two Strikes happy hour at Buffalo Blues in Shadyside. I was apprehensive about going (what with My Hero, at the command of Her Royal Pretentiousness, continually discouraging me from fraternizing with anyone in the agency), but he talked me into it — not that I needed much convincing from him.
Conversation at the bar stopped when we walked through the doors together. I wasn’t sure if they were curious about us or if they were simply amazed that I would defect from the director’s circle. ‘Twas probably a combination of both, but I wasn’t overly fazed at being a show-stopper.
Surprisingly, I had a lot of fun with my colleagues — the ones I am all but barred from getting to know on any more than a surface level. Met an ex-employee, Beth, who made quite the impression. When she cozied up to me and absentmindedly brushed the hair from my face, I knew I’d met a kindred. (I later learned that she and Brat had been involved.) I ended up with her phone number and a kiss on the cheek. 🙂 Chris in Minnesota is MOST impressed with me!!!
Beth and Brat have apparently had some discussions about me. She was telling me that she told him she believes I will take over her reign as queen of Two Strikes. I told her I could only hope to be the princess to her queen. 😉
My buddy Steve (from college, not the wack-nut ex!) arrived awhile later — we had plans to do dinner and drinks, and I had gone to happy hour to kill time till he was available. When he arrived, I noticed that Brat and I really weren’t talking anymore. Steve also commented to me that Brat seemed really uncomfortable, watching me laughing and joking with Steve. Hmm. Interesting.
Finally, I was sitting between Brat and Steve, and I told Brat about Steve’s comment — in response to Beth’s saying how cute Steve is (hey, she’s right, ya know!) — “Yeah, so is my boyfriend!”
That did the trick. Brat warmed up again immediately. Strange.
Beth next cozied up to Steve, and Brat and I went to get drinks. We took different seats and started talking. I was aware that Bonita and Sonia were listening to us, so we attempted to talk in riddles. I asked how Colin was, and from the look on Brat’s face, I knew that was not the happiest relationship. I said that I nevr wanted Colin to be mad at me, and I don’t want tension between them because of me. Brat said that Colin is mad at him. I was surprised by that and asked why — I’d figured Colin was pissed off at me for rebuffing his advances — why on earth would he be mad at Brat? “For obvious reasons,” he said quietly.
I wondered why, because nothing happened. Oh, to have overheard that conversation. …
Steve and I left shortly afterward. Brat walked out with us so that I could get my briefcase and jacket from his car. After he handed me my stuff, our eyes met and we began to embrace. I went to kiss him on the lips (it was reflexive, really), and I thought he would go for it (given the tension building between us thus far), but he turned and kissed me on the cheek instead. I kissed his cheek, too, and Steve and I left. That’s when Beth saw us and had Steve pull over, whereupon she ran up to me and kissed my cheek. One only wonders what would have happened if I’d turned to face her full-on instead. …
Steve theorizes that Brat didn’t want to kiss me in front of him, but I was convinced that either he didn’t want to kiss me on the lips or that he was afraid a colleague might see us — and unfortunately, our grapevine at work has a direct line into HRP’s, and therefore My Hero’s, office.
At any rate, after we left, we met Steve’s friend Matt at Steve’s house. I reached for my phone to call Kristin, only to realized that I’d forgotten my cell phone at Buffalo Blues.
We went back to the bar, but no signs of my phone were evident — the group was gone and the bartenders hadn’t picked one up when they cleaned. I knew the crew was headed to a scary (to me) bar in Wilkinsburg, and we went there in search of my cell. While Steve and Matt sat safely locked in the car, I strolled in to find my buddies. (Let’s just say I didn’t have enough gold ‘teef’ to fit into that bar. …) I went to the back of the bar without incident (whew), and the first person I saw was Brat (hard to miss a hot white boy in a bar like that!). He had my phone in his pocket. He fixated his enormous green eyes on me and wordlessly handed him the phone. I thanked him and whispered that he should come out with my friends and me. I think for a moment he was highly tempted — or, at least he seemed that way — but he thought better of it and opted to stay. I left, looking over my shoulder, noticing that Beth and company were watching our every action.
So, Matt, Steve and I went to dinner at Vinnie’s (I take everybody there — best pizza on earth! I even cheated on my Atkins diet so I could partake). As we were driving back to Pittsburgh from the North Versailles-based restaurant and debating about where else we could go to drink, my trusty cell rang. (Glad I got it back!)
It was Brat. When I picked up, all he said was, “Where are you?”
I knew it was him; I love that voice. I’d know it anywhere. I didn’t need a hello or even a moment to wonder who that was. My body warmed up instantly.
I told him that we were looking for a place to go next, so he suggested The Attic in Oakland. I estimated that we’d be there in 15 minutes. Ten minutes later, he called to ask if we were in Oakland yet (which we were). I noticed later that I’d missed a call in that timeframe — could he have called me three times?
The Attic was, as usual, filled with underage kids — there was a rave going on at the bar below it (formerly The Upstage — I think the new name was Lava Lounge), and it was a dry rave. Ugh. So we went to Denny’s Bar, a tiny place a few streets over that was playing a bunch of Bon Jovi songs on the jukebox (yay!). Brat chose not to drink, which struck us all as odd. I had a few sips of my beer — I wasn’t really in the mood to keep drinking, because I was insanely curious why he wanted to see me.
We started exchanging those unmistakable “I want to kiss you” glances. He would look at me, look away and smile, and I would do the same thing. Finally, he decided it was time to leave … together.
I didn’t even think to say anything to Steve — I was so swept away in whatever heat the moment was holding for me that I couldn’t even form a thought or a plan. All I knew was that we were on the cusp of something and that the night was only just beginning.
Once we were outside, we began holding hands. Across the street from the bar, I turned to him and kissed him on the lips. This time, he didn’t turn away.
I thoroughly enjoyed kissing him. I could seriously kiss him every day for the rest of my life and be happy.
We ended up hiding under someone’s balcony and kissed some more. The taste of him was familiar and sweet, as if I had known him forever. His fingertips found their way under my sweater, drawing circles on the small of my back. He was both cautious and bold, and I was swept away.
Eventually, we headed back to my place. In the car, he took my hand and never let it go. Even when he commented that it was difficult to drive with one hand, I opened my palm to let him have his hand back. But he didn’t want that — he kept his palm pressed against mine until I curled my fingertips around his again.
When we arrived on my street, there were no parking spots left. It was clear that it was my decision whether he came in when he asked, “Will South Carolina be more exciting than tonight?”
I said I thought so. But I invited him in anyway — not planning to do anything sexual. But in my mind, I was intrigued by his covert admission that he was thinking about the two of us during our upcoming escape to Charleston for a development/accounting conference … much like I was.
He said he would come in for a litttle while. Of course, the apartment was in complete disarray — very uncharacteristic of me, by the way — but hopefully I managed to distract him!
I brought Maddie to him. She was quiet, curious, compliant. He must have literally rubbed her the right way, because her tail began bouncing around, and she got her content-kitty look. Then she rubbed her nose against his — and the only other people she does that with are Mom and me. She was clearly — uncharacteristically — charmed by him.
Because Maddie was enthralled, it was just a given that he would have access to the other pussy in the house as well. 😉
I lit some candles and joined him on the couch, kissing him and curling up next to him. I couldn’t believe it — there I was, in the arms of the man who had consumed so many dreams for so many weeks. I was amazed at my fortune.
I’d prefer not to divulge the blow-by-blow (ahem) events of the evening, but let’s just say that it will be a couple of days before my toes uncurl! 😉
I remember every kiss, every tease, every caress. I especially remember lying beneath him, kissing him as he moved inside of me. I remember those phenomenal eyes glistening in the moonlight from my window as we clung to each other. I never wanted to let him go — I never wanted to surrender the ecstasy of being with someone for whom I had developed such intense desire.
Parting, as it eventually occurred, was difficult for me. What went unsaid was that I have never, ever wanted anyone to stay … usually I am thrilled when they are out the door (or, when it’s not my place, when I am the one sprinting for the door).
He quipped that nobody ever tired him out before that, but that’s what I did. I reminded him that he was tired before we even got started. 😉 Then I gave him a lil whack on his cute little ass with his belt.
We held each other for a few moments inside the doorway. He pressed his lips to mine for a very long moment. When he came up for air, he said he knew that kiss wouldn’t last forever, but that he really hoped the impression of it would.
It did — and will.
We talked briefly on the porch (and kissed). He watched till I closed the door — he told me there are crazy people out there, and he wanted me to be safe.
Yep, I’ve fallen. Hard. No turning back on this one.
As he was getting dressed, he told me that he knows that I have a lot to think about. “As do you,” I said. He told me that he would be thinking about this night for a long time to come.
Likewise.
“Are you breathing
What I’m breathing
Are your wishes the same as mine]
Are you needing
What I’m needing
I’m waiting for a sign.
My hands tremble
My heart aches
Is it you calling?
If I’m alone in this
I don’t think I can face
The consequences of falling.”
— k.d. lang, “The Consequences of Falling” —