I am one cranky bitch when I’m deprived of sweets and other disgustingly great foods that I love.

I’m officially on Atkins as of today, although I kept carbs to a minimum for the previous few days. Props to Bill for the cheerleading, although I may need for him to beat me into submission should a weak moment hit that sends me to the ice cream aisle in this fucking sweltering Northern Virginia humidity. 😉

Thanks to everyone who commented on my previous post. Although I said a lot of what was on my mind and had no problem saying it, it’s strange to read my own words (which I did a thousand times). I find it amazing that I can share such intimate things with thousands of readers, but I can’t look someone in the eye, one-on-one, and share these thoughts. How many times I wanted to say to (insert random person from the past here) that they really meant something to me and that I’d like for them to want me for more than just a night (or an hour. …). How many times I wanted to say to (insert random fuck buddy here) that gee, I’m going to fake an orgasm and crawl out as soon as you fall asleep.

I spoke at length about “upgrading,” but what I didn’t disclose was that I knew what I was doing when I was going for the models that were simply *on sale.* I knew the ones who wouldn’t call or come around again. I walked straight into those mousetraps with my eyes wide open. And I walked out the same way.

A part of me wonders if it will always be like this for me … whether I can’t *get* anybody good. But friends throughout the years have pointed me toward people with great potential. And a certain impatience on my part went for those guys immediately, dragging them into bed before they could say their last names. 😉

So today, in a MUCH shorter entry than yesterday (LOL), I pledge to not necessarily try to grow back my hymen, but to date and have fun and enjoy all the boys (whether they like girls or not) for the fun and fabulous human beings that they are. And to continue learning about what I want and don’t want in a partner. I have a pretty good idea of what I want, and I don’t have to settle for less, nor do I have to move any faster than I am comfortable doing. I believe in kismet … and if things are meant to be, they will happen, and if they’re not, they will happen another way that is probably even better than I ever could have envisioned.

Of course, y’all can all make the argument that I’m only chaste right now ’cause I don’t have any offers. ROFL. Can’t disagree with logic, there, can we? 😉

But for the first time in a long time, I feel good. I really do. Perhaps, in line with the pulsating thunderstorm we had here tonight, my raging torrent of emotions have run their course. And Jimmy, thanks for keeping my secrets safe. You’re a doll!

On a lighter note

And I mean physically lighter. Bill sent me these great Atkins-related links, which I wanted to share with those who want to join the bandwagon!

More Atkins

Official carb counter

Low-carb recipes

Discussion board

I’ve got lots of high-carb food here that I can’t eat. Food drive, anyone? 🙂

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