Two small victories yesterday:

1. A guy at Irish Fest walked up to me and gave me his number and asked me to call. I didn’t. I swear he couldn’t be any older than 22. I’m not old enough to be a cougar, but does this make me a bobcat? Either way, since you’re asking yourself, no he wasn’t drunk. 🙂

2. I am working on a project with a former boss. God bless him, I remember why I love him. He came up with the name of our project, and after I thought about it, I came up with a better name. On a conference call Saturday morning, he told everyone the new name and gave me the credit for it. Credit! For my idea! And not being told it sucked at first and then hearing that same person pass it off as their own. WOW! Thank you, Lord, for renewing my faith.

In what is an appropriate transition in my mind, tomorrow would have been my one-year anniversary with my last job. I should have known it would end the way it did by the cluster that day one turned out to be. I was scheduled to start on a Tuesday but then an all-staff memo went out that I was starting Monday. So, to make a good impression and cover up the innocent mistake, I went in Monday. The guy who hired me disappeared for the afternoon, when I assumed we would have at least had a welcome lunch. I spent the next week taking all of my junior staff members out to lunch on my own dime. I also took most other new employees out to lunch as they joined the company, if someone else wasn’t doing it already. As far as I know, they’re all still there. Clearly, getting off on the right foot makes all the difference.

In not-so-victorious (yet) times, though, I’m already behind in my freelance work. It’s a combination of confidence and laziness. I know I took on too much. But I also know I can do it. So the challenge is going to be the standard “beat the clock” until we get into the more-creative endeavors.

I just don’t want to muck this up. I seriously cannot go back to the rat race. I know I’ll come through on everything. It’s just hard to get motivated again. Like with my eating habits — I know I’m unhealthy. I know that in the past 12 months I’ve packed on 30 pounds. I know I am capable of losing it and that I need to lose it. But the urgency hasn’t been there.

But alas, it’s Lent, and I’ve monitored everything that’s gone in my mouth. I’m also watching what’s coming out of it, as I’ve been trying to curb my cussing, too. Baby steps, yo. I have to learn how to come out from under the “urgency” veil and just work at a pace a normal person can handle. But when have I ever been normal, and how am I going to start now?

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