Let me tell you about my day

1. Was up at 5 a.m. finishing today’s e-zine.

2. Moved on to the regular morning projects at 7 a.m.

3. Conference call / commute at 8:30 a.m.

4. 9 a.m. dentist.

5. 10 a.m. conference call.

Note that I am missing for less than an hour, between items 4 and 5.


A.) Editor who knows better sends wrong and half-assed copy.

B.) The kid knows enough to know that the copy is wrong and half-assed and seeks clarification from editor. (GOOD)

C.) Editor says go with it. Editor does not realize copy was wrong and half-assed.

D.) Kid asks me in front of 10 other people on the call if he should proceed with half-assed alert. I say yes and we can always publish a clarification.

E.) You just KNOW I cursed myself into having to write/publish a clarification, right?

F.) I see wrong and half-assed copy that has now gone LIVE and I say to editor, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?

G.) Editor sends revised copy three times, which I do not receive because of profanity and spam filter.

H.) I rewrite copy and test it out.

I.) I find big FUCKING mistake in original copy too. On top of its incoherence.

J.) I make MAGIC, people.

K.) Editor says hey, my e-mails are bouncing back.

L.) Tech sends me the trapped e-mails. Which weren’t as good as the copy I wrote anyway.

M.) I instill terror in all parties involved.

N.) I also inflict terror on others.

O.) And I now have a formal policy in place for MAKING SURE THIS SHIT NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN.

First one to ask me where something is that I haven’t finished in the past eight months can feel free to wander off an open drawbridge right about now.

Actually I am happy. People only learn in crisis. Here it is, bitches.

If I could have done anything different, I wish I would have told the kid to contact my friendly not-sidekick. They would have figured it out together.

Alas, I got the chance to save the day. And THAT, my friends, is about the only thing I am good at. Well, beyond occasionally messing it up in the first place!

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