Jesus, save me from your followers

Dippity Dubya is on TV right now, answering the questions of civilians and military families in West Virginia. I am slightly riveted as I don’t normally work among inarticulate people, so it’s been interesting hearing a non-Grammar Nazi ramble at length about nothing at all.

Someone just mentioned that they pray for him, and he went on a five-minute tangent about how he loves being president because everybody’s praying for him. Dude, let’s get the record straight. We’re praying for you to NOT FUCK UP any more than you already have.

We’re praying for good sense to enter into your head when you’re making the magnanimous decisions that your successors are going to have to live with and/or undo. We’re on our knees begging for our troops to come home safely and not in the cargo section of trans-Atlantic flights where they will be buried in Arlington Cemetery, where I’ve witnessed a burial EVERY GODDAMNED MORNING except Sunday, when I only saw mourners on their knees laying flowers on the graves of their loved ones.

Even the atheists and the pagans are turning to their Higher Powers and just asking for the mercy of the powerful over those who are powerless.

My point here? Don’t flatter yourself. We’re praying to thrive — that’s all we’re doing here. It sure beats Becoming Republican!

2 Responses to Jesus, save me from your followers

  1. Valbee :

    Did you see The Daily Show last night??? I *loved* the Rambling Man segment, especially the “speech” that they ended with. If you haven’t seen it yet, it’s on Comedy Central’s website. I think it’s absolutely genius!

  2. Sabre :

    Would it be mean if I said I was praying for a Greyhound bus to accidently knock him off his bike? And then accidently move forward too much? And then back up to see what happened? And the move forward to see it some more? Maybe some more backing up?

    It would, wouldn’t it?