I’m ready for that rich husband. Like, yesterday.

The hour and a half I spent the dentist’s chair getting a HOLE DRILLED IN MY HEAD so far has been the highlight of the day.

When he was coming at me with the needle, I said why do you people have to upcharge me for novocaine when I’ve been numb inside for years?

I started working at the crack o’ me today. It’s 7:28 p.m. and I’m going to take a break and do something else around the house I need to do. Then I get to sign back on again and do more work.

Don’t you wish you were me?

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