Customer disservice

Look, I am one of those people who — if I can do something myself — I will DO it and I will do it WELL. I hate asking people for anything and I hate it even worse when there’s something I cannot do at ALL.

There’s this company I deal with because, well, fate has thrown me that hand. I order from them once a month. They are in California, a good 3,000-plus miles away.

I used to buy their product from a much more competent third-party distributor. This company was efficient and effective. It also delivered to my post office box.

This wonderful party discontinued the product, so I have to order from the manufacturer.

I cannot find an acceptable substitute. And believe me, I’ve tried.

So today makes FOUR times — FOUR!!!! — that the manufacturer has Fucked Up my order.

Not the order so much as the address.

First of all, I’ve been ordering from them for years. YEARS. And my disgust grows stronger with every passing DAY.

So, they get the order right, but the fuck up the shipping address every time.

First of all, they refuse to ship via USPS and send things into the abyss known as UPS. I hate UPS. I got cut off tonight at 7:30 p.m. on the Beltway by a UPS truck. I almost crashed into it. Maybe it held my package!

Anyway, this manufactuer-type company — what they do is delete my company name from the address. Which, duh, I work in a Big Complex with Lots of Companies. My name + street address + city and state doesn’t do a shit bit of good to a UPS driver with a bajillion other companies to visit. I highly doubt they’d go that extra step to ask every business if I work there.

Anyway, last month when the order got fucked up, I called the company and asked WTF was going on. The customer service rep tried to convince me I was nuts. Which I would have accepted HAD IT NOT HAPPENED BEFORE. So he assured me that he made the change in their database but that I’d have to hunt down UPS to find out where my package went. *sigh*

It was suggested that there might have been a glitch with the website where I’d ordered it from. He told me to just call next time, as the phone people are quite competent.

Fast-forward to last week. I called, I ordered, I confirmed the company name was listed, I conquered.

Or so I’d thought.

I got my confirmation e-mail on Saturday to say the order had been shipped. Was their a company address on it? Noooooo.

For the record, in my MANY conversations with this company, I’d bitched to holy hell how I HATE sending shit to work because it’s nobody’s business what I’m ordering. And I hate it that they don’t deliver to P.O. Boxes, as when shit gets sent home, I’m never there for it and UPS ain’t open on weekends, so my stuff invariably gets placed in a holding facility until I can somehow swing some time to go stand in line on a workday to get it.


OK, so I called the company on Saturday — AGAIN — and raised hell, only to be told, “There’s no company name for you on file. Just (Blah blah addresscakes).”

I flipped. I mean, really. I lost my cookies. I asked where I can order their product, because the product is superb but their staff are fucking MORONS.

I was given the name of another third-party distributor (which, for the record, does NOT sell it and YES I DID CHECK). I was also told that, “We’ve made the fix to your records THIS TIME” and that “Um, you’ll have to contact UPS yourself to get the package in transit.”




I have them on speed dial.

So I called UPS on Saturday. I explained that we’d gone through this before with this stupid company and could they pretty please make it all better like they did the last time?

The rep assured me that he made the fix to my records while I was on the line. And that I’d get the package Monday.

So with today being Tuesday night and I’m on fire, guess who has YET to see her package?

I went to the UPS tracking website, where it has said for two days that there’s no company name/suite number and therefore the thing is undeliverable. And it also bore the CROCK OF SHIT of “We are trying to verify the address.”

With whom?

Seriously, WITH WHOM are you verifiying this address? I gave two reachable phone numbers (real ones! Not the usual fake ones I give out to creditors and such!) and neither one of those bitches were ringing duriing the past week!

So I got a UPS customer service rep on the line today and, per the usual, RAISED HOLY HELL.

Her response?

“There’s no record of you calling on Saturday. There’s no company name on file. You’ll have to pick up the package yourself in (city that I don’t know worth a shit).”

My blood? BOILING.

I asked why I paid for shipping and handling in the first place.
She rescheduled the delivery for tomorrow.

God willing, I’ll see it. I’m not suffering through these semantics for something I can do without.

I hate this shit.

UPDATE: The package came first thing in the morning. Sweet! I dread when I need to order again next month. …

One Lonely Response to Customer disservice

  1. Caterwauling :

    […] First I’m going to burn down their building. Then I’m going to light myself on fire. But even before all that, I want what I paid for. […]