At least I was smiling

“Well be pleased, girl
If this is what you wanted
The whole world
Is watching you take the stage
What will you say?”

— Plumb, “Real”

Life’s been one weird sequence of events lately. I’ve now put down a deposit on a FOURTH apartment this morning, as I cannot decide because I don’t love anything enough to take it but I don’t want to lose them in case the journey keeps getting more abysmal. I like this one. I always liked this one. I didn’t apply at it when I was moving last year because I thought it was too expensive, but this year? It’s the best value for what I get. And I was such a bitch, trying to give it the white-glove test today. I’d like to take it; we’ll see about that damn credit score before we get our hopes up!

Mom came down to visit this weekend. I love having her here. I forget how much I miss her until I see her. It’s hard for me to go to where she lives because my grandfather is everywhere and I can’t talk past the lump in my throat, knowing he’s not there anymore. She just got the final autopsy report (three months after the fact) and she thinks she sees a real point we can sue over. God, I hope it’s there. I’d rather have him here, but if he’s not, then hot damn somebody had better pay for destroying the best human being who ever walked this earth.

Mom brought the new boyfriend to meet me. We spent most of the weekend in Baltimore, as I am one of those D.C. denizens who runs like HELL when there are tourists in town (i.e., Paddy’s day parade on Sunday). Of course, dummy here didn’t count on B’more having its parade on the same goddamned day (d’oh!), but it was fine. We hung out at the Inner Harbor, ate dinner at Ruth’s Chris and just enjoyed the break from routine.

It occurs to me that I am to do some charity volunteering that requires getting like donations and shit. Damn. How much of a check do I have to write (or, *can* I write) to fulfill whatever expectation they had?

Speaking of expectations (and falling short, apparently), my boss never visits me — he’s one of those people who trusts that he’s hired adults who can do their jobs. Which I love, natch, but of course the one time he’s visited me in the past two months, I was staring off into the sky, daydreaming. 🙂 Hey, at least I had a stupid grin on my face!

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