Ain’t too proud to blog
1. What is the first blog you remember reading?
Oh gawd. I vaguely remember reading Fark quite a long time ago. I also loved something called MightyBigTV, which was the predecessor to Television Without Pity, although I guess those aren’t blogs. Hmm.
There were a ton of “big” blogs back in the day that I won’t bother linking, but then somehow a big ol’ free-for-all sprung up and everyone started flinging poo about each other. I think the one blog (to me) that rose out and above it all was A Small Victory. I don’t really read it anymore, but I’ve interacted with the site owner and she’s what they call “good people.”
2. If you have a blog, how long have you been blogging? If you don’t, how long have you been commenting on blogs?
First blog: Summer 2001. Lots of pain, heartache, woe, agony. Diaryland.net deleted it after I didn’t log in for a coupla months. So then I started the first incarnation of Caterwauling in early 2002, although the current version only starts in August 2004 ’cause I said some stuff that’s better left off the air.
3. What do you think are the best aspects of blogging?
It defines a part of me. It’s “mandatory fun time” in which I can take a brain break and throw it out there for people to read or not, whichever. For me, it’s a living diary, as I don’t have time to write in my “real” journal. I say little things that I can look back on and remember the subliminal message that probably no one else got. I guess the blog lets me just air stuff without actually *saying* it in so many words.
4. And the worst?
Knowing that not all of your readers have your best interests at heart. That you can only dole out *so much* of yourself before putting yourself at some kind of risk. That words you wrote in an impassioned moment expose you to not even just debate, but also some hurtful stuff too, not to mention that anything you say can and WILL be held against you — even costing you your livelihood if you’re not careful.
5. Do you find yourself censoring what you write (either in your blog or in comments) based on who you think will see what you’ve written, or do you tend to throw caution to the wind and bare your soul?
I used to do the latter. I wanted to share as much of myself as I could. I’d gotten many a compliment that I “put it all out there” and didn’t apologize for who I was, what I thought and what I wanted. Now I start typing entries and realize that there are people out there who obsess over every word, just like in your life how there’s always someone who gets to know you so intimately, only to wallop you over the head with what they perceive is one of your weak spots.
Tiff said something interesting to me recently, about some cretin who sent a couple of messages that were on the obnoxious side, that I’m too good of a person to really fire back on the level that said attacks deserved. I appreciated that. Even in my head, I just rolled my eyes and hoped that they’d just get laid already and get the hell out of my backyard.
6. Have you ever written anything you wish you hadn’t? Have you ever deleted your posts or your comments?
I go back and edit just because that’s in my nature. It goes back to the theory of writing a letter when you’re angry and tearing that bitch up before anybody sees it. I used to put stuff in draft mode, but I’m too afraid of it going live accidentally, so I don’t bother with that anymore.
I vaguely remember having someone demand that I rip down a post because I had (in my opinion) told a comical (TRUE) story that didn’t exactly paint that person in the best light. I took it down not because I wanted to, but because I needed for the whining to go away. The bottom line is that I only tell stories that somehow affect me, and therefore I feel like I *can* comment on them and, thus, should be able to give it my own personal flavor.
I’ve kept a lot of stories offline, from the stressful to the happy moments. There are lots of both, but not only do I not share my lows, I really don’t feel like giving it up for all the special moments either — they’re mine to cherish.
7. About how many hours a week do you spend blogging or and/or reading blogs?
I visit my NewsGator file a few times a day, spending all told about a half-hour to an hour daily. (There’s a special place in heaven for those of you who publish full RSS feeds.)
I spend equal time doing my own blogging. I type as quickly as I think so it’s not cumbersome. I probably spend more time thinking about what I’m going to write than actually writing it.
8. If you blog, do you think there will come a time when you just stop doing it? If you don’t blog, do you think you’ll ever start?
Everyone stops blogging here and there, and I don’t. My life sometimes spirals out of control and shit happens, but my blog is my comfort. I hate when I feel like I’m getting attacked on it because it’s my sacred space. I don’t go crap on other people’s sites if I disagree with them and I don’t use it as a method to *get* to people who might not want to talk to me in real life. Meaning, I don’t publish my e-mail address for a reason, and if you want to try to get my goat via a comment, do so if it makes you get to sleep at night, but comment moderation and outright blacklisting prevents people I do care about from seeing inane bullshit that has nothing to do with them.
9. Do you share things on your blog or in comments that you don’t necessarily share in your “real” life?
Sometimes. I mean, I tell my mom and my best friend practically everything, but some of the day-to-day stuff I’d forget about if I didn’t capture it here. Most of my real-life friends don’t read the blog, so I get to share stuff I don’t necessarily want them to know. I mean, it’s out there — everyone knows I have this page. And it’s neat that disclosure has meant having more privacy than I’d ever imagined.
10. Ask me something blog-related.
Would you still be working with the she-troll if life hadn’t taken its course the way it had?