Madden by Maddie
Mommy hasn't tidied up our trio of litterboxes in DAYS, so I decided to shit in her shoes and wipe my ass on her apartment-hunting paperwork.
I shit so much, she had to throw away her new, cloth Steve Madden shoes. She was torn about keeping them because she doesn't like to spend that kind of money on stuff but she indulged herself for giggles. But she should know that with giggles come shits (i.e., when it comes to "shits and giggles," I do one and she's NOT doing the other!).
So, she's definitely not keeping the shoes (they're in the garbage now!), but she can't get her money back unless she can prove that the wet, steamy poop came with them.
Do I care? Not so much -- she just cleaned the litterbox, so mission accomplished!