Teams-free vacation, all I ever wanted
I want so much to write about the amazing, amazing vacation I just took.
The friends I reunited with.
The fact that the hotel-key-to-credit-card ratio in my wallet is 1-to-1.
Alas.
I want to burn down Teams.
I also want to escort a certain person to hell for interrupting my halloween.
And I want to toss another MFer into the cauldron for not only pinging and harassing me daily but for also shit-talking me AND starting up the nonsense full force the literal minute I got back to work.
You make a rock. One that will not make our customers or the company any money. You say that rock has been achieved. But that rock gets pelted at me to be executed and fulfilled for the rest of my career.
I have zero interest in this person who created the rock. They were so verbally abusive to me for so long, they no longer exist to me.
So ok fine, I was in no hurry to help with said rock. And when I get done with my work at 5, I don’t exactly want to stay online to do their work for them.
Which, I get it — I get it. Only I can do this work. So the rock should have been mine if it was so important to the company. But it wasn’t. It’s important to that person. And, again, the moment it’s executed, it becomes my problem into perpetuity. At the expense of, or at least in addition to, things that make the customers and the company money that I am 100% committed to.
I was literally in Disneyland, staring at California Adventure from my hotel, when this person sends a Teams message. This time asking where I was because there was a meeting and I wasn’t there.
Normally I am very good at ignoring this person. But as I was working on East Coast time anyway, I said I didn’t know about any meeting. (I mean, if I am so necessary to this production, would you really schedule something and assume I show up … when I’ve had an out of office message up for like four weeks to say I am not there?)
To which, this cherub says oh I didn’t know you were out.
The fact that I haven’t been answering any of your messages (though I was working — just not showing myself as available, so I could maybe enjoy some of that scheduled PTO at some point) didn’t give it away?
I said in a probably not nice way that I am indeed working on my PTO. I am in fact staring at Disneyland as I work on newsletters that need to go out.
And this is YOUR rock, cupcake. You can gather the shit I said I needed. (To which they said they weren’t aware of what was turned in — and I see their name on every email I did receive.)
And furthermore, when I work on PTO, I am not working on other people’s rocks. Just my own.
Anyway, I left Teams up, as I do, the whole trip. It’s annoying to hear from people I don’t need to hear from. But on the off chance my team chooses to contact me that way, I didn’t want to miss it.
Like one of my people’s house got hit by a fucking hurricane. So I was aware of that. THAT is why I stay online. Not for ol’ Cuppycakes to announce at a directors’ meeting that I said my PTO ended on the fourth and how awful a human I am that I did not attend a meeting on the fourth.
THROUGH the fourth, you goober.
Also, you know where they got that info? From the OOO notification they told me they weren’t aware of!
So once again, instead of doing the thing that will get her the fuck off my ass, I have other stuff that — guess what — can make money for the customers and the company. And I am prioritizing it.
She is Big Mad that I am making us look like idiots with her little friends.
Guess what, dingbat. You promised them I’d do all this shit, and i have not done all this shit.
Did it not occur to you to A) do the shit I asked for someone to do, so I could move it forward?
And/or B) to tell these outside people that hey this chick is on vacation and let’s all hold our fuckin horses a hot minute.
No this heffa wakes up on the fifth and starts an email chain from absolute hell where they are all excoriating me for not paying rapt attention to them.
Considering that I had 3,768 unread emails already … things I would have been addressing all along if seeing her name didn’t bring me pure rage all week … you know, like bills to pay … I am not reading the newest ones first.
Also that’s the only criticism I will accept. That I missed processing expenses and invoices. Which I normally DO do on vacation because I don’t fuck with money.
But no, I wanted to keep my blood pressure in check and actually CHECK OUT from the person who is truly the main and, often, only source of my stress.
And now everyone is looking to be paid.
And not that I disagree with what the new “rock” is set to achieve.
But if we wanted to bust open some wine and have a chatty chat, I will admit I have some concerns.
So, no, I really haven’t been all like FUCK YEAH LET’S DO THIS YOLO.
Shit I have projects I WANT to do that I haven’t had the mental bandwidth for.
But they all have the sweet sweet absence of Cupcake, so I assure you I don’t mind doing them on PTO, weekends, nights or whatever it takes to catch up on them.
Though it would be nice to remove this foot from my ass. Though it’d be nicer still if some other item doesn’t get dreamed up after this one.
Maybe that’s it. I’m so afraid of the next project that I have a mental block against the current one.
Or also it’s trying to decipher the 88 Teams and email messages since I’m sure they’re clear as mud that’s keeping me locked in my own mental prison over here.
I think I need another vacation. Fuck yeah let’s do THAT — YOLO!