There is officially NOTHING a pint o’ Haagen-Dazs can’t fix

Dude, cinnamon dulce de leche. Seriously. It tastes just like a cinnamon dolce latte (with soy milk, natch) from Starbucks. I loves me some cinnamon and caramel. :9

It’s been a day here atop Goddess’ fiefdom. I put in my termination notice at my apartment building, and they were all, “What a surprise!” Surprise? How many fucking times did I call, e-mail and visit, asking for a new, bigger unit? Seriously, people. I’m at the end of my rope, and all y’all do is keep giving me MORE rope!

Look, I know these places don’t care about us. And hell, I WANT to stay here. I LOVE it here. But when I asked for the keys to go tour the model unit so I can think this through a little better (I can still stay here — I put down a deposit on the new place but I can get it back right now), they gave me the wrong keys. Either that or told me the wrong floor/unit to go to.

I’ve never worked so damn hard in my life, to stay at this place. I tried the keys in four different doors before I gave up, threw them at the agent, and walked the hell back to my door. She gave me a halfhearted, “Stay in touch,” because there are two open units that I can consider.

The other thing that pissed me off was that they made me sign to allow them to take tours through Goddess’ territory before the lease expires. HUNH?!?! When I was taking this place, they didn’t let me see it. Why should I let someone into my shit-streaked world before I’m ready? Ponderous.

I’m so tired. I’m so afraid to collapse, because I don’t know if I will get up again. This whole moving business means losing my grandfather all over again, because it sucked and it hurts like hell and I cry every day, without fail, for him. And now, with the move becoming a reality, it’s like shit — he’s really gone. The world that was turned upside-down is now going in reverse at warp speed.

Maybe that’s why I’ve hated every apartment I’ve looked at. Holding on to the one I have and love has meant nothing has really changed. I was waiting for a feeling about where to go and what to do, and because the feeling never came, I could remain stationary. But now logic is taking over and it is telling me to just figure it out already.

Maybe magic is what you make of it. You just take it with you if it isn’t working where you are trying to use it. Good times can be had, and marvelous memories can be made, absolutely anywhere. And if there’s one thing I particularly excel at, it’s moving forward and never looking back. …

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