Caterwauling

Stolen from the lovely Sabre. …

Never Date a Cancer

Clingy, emotional, and very private - it’s hard to escape a Cancer’s clutches. And while Cancer will want to know everything about you, they’re anything but open in return. Instead try dating: Leo, Sagittarius, Gemini, or Aquarius

Who, me?

Genghis Khunt Random Brutal Sex Master (RBSM) We almost called you Brutus the Uterus and attached this picture: But we figured you wouldn’t understand, and rightly so. We don’t understand either. So you are Genghis Khunt: master of man, bringer of pain–riding your way to conquest after conquest. Your sexual avarice is legendary. You’ve already had an unusually high amount of experience, and, still you look for more. You intimidate many. You make no apologies. Your exact female opposite: The Sonnet Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer Personality-wise, you’re carefree and relatively easy-going. You don’t plan things out ahead of time; you tend to live in the moment. Of course, this can cause some damage when the moment happens to include a screaming orgasm with his younger brother. Hence the ‘brutal’ tag we’ve given you. But you know what, take five seconds to lock the doors, and you’ll be fine. There’s nothing wrong with a little sex, or a whole lot. AVOID: The Slow Dancer (DGLD) CONSIDER: The 5-Night Stand (DBSM), The Hornivore (RBSM), The Playboy (RGSM) Link: The Online Dating Persona Test @ OkCupid - free online dating.

Apparently I’ve been tagged for a meme. Which, yay, ’cause I wanted to write but have nothing to say!

RULEZ:

1.We have to post these rules before we give you the facts.
2. Players start with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
3. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
4. At the end of your blog post, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
5. Don’t forget to leave them each a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Lordy. Just eight?

But eight I have to say in public?

Oy.

The abridged version, then. Here goes.

1. HABIT: I scratch off my fingernail polish from the cuticles on up. I play with my hands when I’m trying not to talk/make eye contact/emote, so the nails tend to get annihilated as a casualty for my reticence.

2. FACT: I work harder on volunteer projects than I do on paid projects, although it’s hard to tell the difference. But there’s something about helping someone out who really needs it — and, let me clarify, who is worthy of it — that lights my fire more than anything. I guess it’s more that I would rather do what I want than what I must.

3. HABIT: I have a crystal hanging from my rearview mirror, and I always rub it to remove the stress from my body in traffic — it’s my worry stone. I’m so absentminded that I don’t realize it, but when I let a friend drive my car and he rubbed it, I was stunned that others noticed this compulsion.

4. HABIT: When I need to make a big decision, I have to head to a park for either a ride on the swingsets or to at least stare at a lake or something. Even if I spend five minutes there, I always feel rejuvenated and can uncover the resolution with a clear mind.

5. FACT: Same as Lachlan, I have some symmetry issues. I also share something in common with Mark Wahlberg, and it ain’t the big, ah, appendage we saw in “Boogie Nights.”

6. FACT: I am a walking divergence. I’m insanely impatient some days but completely “enh — whatever” on others. I am decisive but I oftentimes decide against making a decision. I am over-the-top passionate yet I can turn off that switch in zero-point-six seconds. I’ll either raise hell or kill you with kindness — and you’re never going to be able to predict my reaction, so don’t even try. Some days I’m the social butterfly, others I’m the caterpillar.

7. HABIT: I tend not to deal with things until they are in crisis mode. I try very hard to plan ahead, but so much other bullshit crops up in the interim that I let things slide until they can no longer be ignored. (Hey, no one ever said the habits had to be good or cute ones!)

8. FACT: I don’t get worked up into a lather about anything other than the opposite sex. I’m pretty even-keeled in general, but man, don’t hurt or disrespect me because I’ve been known to hit the gas pedal really hard when I see you walking across the street. I’ve only recently noticed this about myself and will work on it, but I’m quicker to say “fuck you” than I am to hang around to feel the need to have to say it again. But yeah, some folks are lucky that I have very good brakes!

Now I have to tag eight lucky people. But since this didn’t come with a “send this to eight people so you can have everlasting love, luck and happiness” schpiel, I’ll leave it to y’all who want to do it to, well, do it. But Mel? SilverBlue? I’m looking at you. …

I’m not insinuating that Sabre knows how to goof off online really well, but she DOES post some treasures.

Odd Questions. BE TRUTHFUL.

1) Do you talk in your sleep?
Oh yeah. I was told that I sing, too. *hides face*

2) Ocean or pool?
Ocean, lake, river, pool, reservoir, whatever — you can always find me near water in my free time. Not IN it, just NEAR it.

3) What’s your favorite song at the moment?
I’m going with whatever pops up on iTunes, which honestly, truly happens to be Bon Jovi f/LeAnn Rimes, “Till We Ain’t Strangers Anymore.”

4) Current Crush?
*cough* *swallows tongue* Can I mention another favorite song? A tie between Chris Cornell’s “Billie Jean” and Tori Amos’ “Digital Ghost”?

5) What’s your favorite color(s)?
Black, cobalt blue, purple, red

6) Window seat or aisle seats?
It’s always been window, but after some miserable West Coast flights smashed against the wall with no oxygen as we parked on the tarmac, I’m thinkin’ aisle from now on.

7) Ever met anyone famous?
Scott Baio (in his heyday), Kip Winger (slightly past his heyday), Franco Harris, Lynn Swann, Justin Strzelczyk, Bill Cowher, Mario Lemieux, Jaromir Jagr (hmm, lots of Pittsburgh sports legends), almost met Lisa Lampanelli — was standing 10 feet from her and could have gotten in line to see her, but I was dying of dysentery or something and couldn’t do it.

8) Do you feel that you’ve had a truly successful life?
I’m getting there.

9) Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?
I complain if a restaurant doesn’t serve a spoon with my ’sketti.

10) Ricki Lake or Oprah Winfrey?
How old is this survey? “Me want Maury!”

11) Basketball or Football?
Football

12) How long do your showers last?
Judging by my utilities, they aren’t short.

13) Do you know how to drive a stick?
Although I always have my hand on the gearshift, no, only automatic.

14) Cake or ice cream?
Frosting!

15) Are you self-conscious?
Yes, but not prohibitively so. I’d rather call it self-aware

16) Have you ever given money to a bum?
Bleeding-heart, tree-hugger liberal hippie gave some money to bums when she was in college. Then she saw one dressed up and doing just fine a day or two later. I’ve given something to people here and there — mostly to the ones who threaten harm to my car if I don’t.

17) Have you been in love?
Not really.

18) Where do you wish you were?
In my happy place, although I’m getting there. It just takes awhile to unwind after these marathon days.

19) Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
Once after an accident I was in; another just because my mom was fucking a medic and it was fun to ride in it.

20) Can you tango?
Tried. FAILED.

21) Last gift you received?
My colleague keeps leaving me cat food from her finicky cats. But a gift for me? Unless I bought it myself, I really can’t remember.

22) Last sport you played?
Thumb-wrestling

23) Things you spend a lot of money on?
Dumb shit, like Wal-Mart and Target runs. Nothing special, nothing collectible, nothing with any value if I needed to sell it.

25) Last wedding attended?
Tom & Tiff’s, one year ago in June.

26) Favorite FAST food restaurant?
“Fast” is overstating the issue here in D.C. with, ah, communication barriers. Just sat in Mickey D’s drive-thru for 25 minutes … and I was first in line. But my favorite? I do loves me some Checkers.

27) Most hated food(s)?
Onions. Raw, half-cooked, fried — I don’t care. I will eat onion rings only if someone strips out the onion.

28) Can you sing?
“Can” is pushing the issue. My poor colleague always seems to walk on me when I’ve got the headphones on and hear something I’m particularly happy to obliviously sing to.

29) Last person you called?
I know, Will, I owe you about 40 calls! I last called my friend Shan.

30) What’s your least fav. chores?
Litter-getter. I fucking hate my cats’ stanky booties.

31. Favorite Drink?
Sweet tea. With a lime wedge.

32) Are your parents married or divorced?
Never married. Dad a deadbeat.

33) Do you eat meat?
I’m with Sabre on this one — “I can has cheezburger?”

34) Do you believe in Heaven?
Starting to.

35) Have you ever come close to dying?
Probably more times than I’m consciously aware of.

36) What jewelry do you wear 24/7?
Lately it’s a silver Figaro chain and three earrings. I have a whole armoire I never even bother opening.

37) Are you eating?
You know what dinner was? Cleaning out the Candy Corner at work. Cherry Tootsie Pop, strawberry Twizzlers, chocolate-covered raisins. Mmmm.

39) Do you wear makeup?
I can has spackle? All the time, my sweets. It’s for your benefit as well as mine.

40) Can you dance?
I was just groovin’ in the kitchen with the cats to Gwen Stefani’ new single.

41) Would you ever have plastic surgery?
Does a bear shit in the woods and eat salmon in the river in TV commercials?

42) What do u wear to bed?
Boxers and a T-shirt.

43) Have you ever done anything illegal?
Not under this name. Well, OK, yeah I did.

44) Can you roll your tongue?
You wanna see?

45) A sphincter says what?
If I quoted people, they might realize I was calling them what they are!

46) What kind of sneakers?
Bejeweled flip-flops and wedges. I don’t paint my toenails for my health!

48) What is your Hair color?
Light brown/dark red/blonde hybrid

49) Future child’s name?
I’ve got a girl’s name picked out, although I’d prefer to have a boy.

50) Do you snore?
I don’t sleep.

51) If you could go anywhere in the world where would it be?
Gay Paree, baybee! And Italy, too. Met a boy in a bar recently who claimed to be Italy-bound. It was perhaps the only reason I continued the conversation as long as I did!

52) Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
I have two cats who must be near me at night. Little purballs.

53) If you won the lottery, what would you do first?
Take a day off of work to go cash the check. And buy an Apple Store. Yes, the whole store!

54) Gold or silver?
Silver

55) Hamburger or hot dog?
I can has cheezburger?

56) If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Italian

57) City, beach or country?
City

58) What was the last thing you touched?
Petted a kitteh. And sneezed six times.

59) Where did you last eat?
Other than at work? Famous Dave’s

60) When’s the last time you cried?
On Saturday when my friend’s nearly 4-year-old daughter left me an adorable voice message and I heard it while I was sitting in the Mickey D’s drive-thru for 25 minutes.

61) Do you read blogs?
Do you pee in the shower?

62) Would you ever go out dressed like the opposite sex?
And the point of that would be … ?

63) Ever been involved with the police?
I have acquainted myself with a few in the area for safety purposes.

64) What’s your favorite shampoo/conditioner and soap?
Whatever’s on sale. Currently it’s some sort of Herbal Essences Hello Hydration stuff and Tone bodywash that’s scented like White Lily and Sugar Cane.

As seen at Sabre’s.

1. I’ve come to realize that my last kiss was… perhaps more important to me than I ever let on.

2. I am listening to… cats hissing at each other.

3. I talk… a whole bunch when I don’t know what to say.

4. I love… getting out of the house and seeing the world.

5. My best friends… are an inspiration and show me how worthy I am as a person to have such a strong circle of fabulous people.

6. My Car… is cute, fabulous and my salvation

7. My love life… is the source of much confusion

8. I hate it when people ask… actually, I hate it when they don’t

9. I want to… catch up on my beauty sleep

10. Marriage is… a goal

11. Somewhere, someone is thinking… how can I meet up with this spectacular girl who runs Caterwauling.com?

12. I’m always… lost inside my head

13. I have a secret crush on… they know And no one else needs to!

15. My cell phone… wishes it were an iPhone. I can’t WAIT to trade in the ROKR for an iPhone, although I doubt it’ll be today even though I want to go stand in line at the AT&T store so badly I can taste it!

16. When I wake up in the morning… I head straight to my Senseo machine for a cuppa java joy

17. Before I go to bed I… try to remember to take off my makeup; usually I just fall asleep watching Comedy Central

18. Right now I am thinking about… how much time I had to waste on ridiculous tasks and playing 20 questions with people who are intent on stalling me and not doing any REAL work this week

19. Babies are… a little more on my radar, as I step further into my 30s

20. I get on MySpace… to blog privately once every few months (only Chris, Sabre and Tetris can see what I’m up to)

21. Today I… woke up without the alarm clock, right at 6:35 a.m. (I forgot to set the alarm, and that is my normal wake-up time!)

22. Tonight I will… find some trouble to get into, if I’m not at work till all hours

23. Tomorrow I will… get the hell out of the house and be social

24. I really want to… experience magic

25. Someone who will most likely repost this… is probably as hard-up for content and as eager to avoid work as I am!