Caterwauling

… Remember, kids, if McCain is the one who gets to pick the next set of Supreme Court justices and he lives up to his promise to overturn Roe v. Wade, stupid people will continue procreating at a rapid rate.

Have you heard about the fucking moronic teen girls in the pregnancy pact? I think vacuum aspiration should be mandatory for those stupid bitches. Save the clothes hanger for beating them with it.

Some of the girls reacted to the news they were pregnant with high fives and plans for baby showers, (Principal Joseph) Sullivan said. One of the fathers “is a 24-year-old homeless guy,” Sullivan told the magazine.

Mind *boggles.*

Sidenote: Those brats had better not be getting baby showers. Just saying. We celebrate idiocy enough in this world enough, thanks.

Anyway, I know any dumb fertile asshole can become a parent, but let’s not prove the same is true of the U.S. presidency, mmkay? I still haven’t gotten into the “vote Obama” groove, but I sure as hell am steady on “for the love of God, don’t vote McCain.”

Worked from home this a.m. and decided to do the afternoon shift at a wireless hotspot simply because my bloated ass feels and looks way better in my cute new jean shorts.

Alas, I’m here now and the firewall is blocking the Web site that I’m supposed to be working on. Aarrgghh!

Am just gonna finish my salad and hightail it to the office. Besides, this annoying mother of 14 sitting next to me yelled at me to take a farther-away table just in case her kids wanted mine. The hell? Now she’s talking loudly with the mother four tables away from her (i.e., two away from me) so I get it. Really. You’re a whore who needs to have her tubes (and her vocal cords) tied.

Good thing I brought a pair of pants more suitable for work, just in case.

I do see the usefulness in having kids though. I forgot to grab a knife (heh — good thing) and Splenda for my black currant iced tea. At least she can dispatch her toddler to the condiment station. I wish I’d been nicer to her, as I can’t abandon my shit-ton of electronics just to get a lil spoonful of sugar for myself.

Of course, she beats the dumb bitch who was in line behind me by a mile, as her natural voice was baby talk. Even when she wasn’t addressing her toddler. I wanted to fork her eyeball if it wouldn’t have resulted in even more high-pitched shrieking, although it would have been amusing to see if her voice could possibly have risen another octave.

Delayed by at least a dozen years but no sense in waiting any longer:

Hey Psychofag,

Just because you comment doesn’t mean I have to read it. The “mass edit” mode helps me to make you disappear from my Web site the way you need to evaporate from my life.

You hate me? Sorry to hear it. You want me to die? Believe me, if it rids me of you, it’s apparently not the worst option. You wanna keep making fun of a dead man who was loved more than you’ll ever be? Have at it — you can’t hurt him and therefore you can’t hurt me.

Since unsubscribing from my blog feed or, gasp, not visiting Caterwauling.com is clearly above your intelligence level, too bad — so sad.

I was through with you in 1993. I was through with you in 1995. I was through with you in 1998. I was through with you pretty much the whole period between 2002 and now. And what, do you think I miss you? I miss someone who doesn’t exist anymore (and hasn’t, for some time now). Or maybe that person was an illusion you showed me to try to get someone like me into your clutches or that vicious circle inside your head.

I admit, all those times I came back? Were because I was afraid. Keeping one’s enemies closer, blah blah blah. I spent too much time being afraid and settling for sub-par scraps of so-called friendship. You were so afraid of me finding better friends, because I’d leave when I did. You were right. So stop punishing me for it and start changing to be someone that others would WILLINGLY hang around.

Get help. Get healthy. Unlike your latest directive, no I’m not going to die. But as I once again have to be the better person (you haven’t made it difficult to do that), I want you to LIVE. I want you to THRIVE. I want you to see how AWESOME life can be without anger and hatred bubbling out of every pore.

My pastor says sometimes you have to keep forgiving people, even when you’ve already done it a million times. Let’s make it a million and one and cap it there.

When you look back on your life and realize how much time you spent trying to make people supposedly regret not being your friend — instead of trying to be a better friend to those who were within arm’s reach — you’ll realize all the love you missed out on (that you willingly sacrified).

Stop using people and start loving yourself. Ask God to help you change, and even you will be amazed at how truly great He can help you to be. And even for those times that I couldn’t forgive you, maybe He will. …

Goddess (and don’t you forget it)